Monday, February 23, 2009

Serious Thoughts

Dear Charlotte,

I don't have any fancy words for you tonight. I don't have cute pictures, or funny stories, and I can't tell you that anything spectacular has happened to us in the last two weeks.

What I can tell you is that this afternoon, I watched you fall asleep in your crib with your thumb in your mouth, snuggled between snow-white fleece and the blanket I made you. I listened to your little baby snores, and I watched your eyelashes flutter like tiny butterfly wings against your soft pink cheeks. I kissed your downy head, and then I went across the hall to Daddy's and my room. Your daddy and his poor injured body were taking a nap. And I watched him sleep. I listened to his much louder snores, and I watched his eyelashes flutter against his soft cheeks. I kissed his nose, and then I lay down next to him and fell asleep too.

When I woke up, the light in the room was different, and your daddy had taken most of my covers, which I suppose is fair since I took his pillow. Your doggie and kittie were curled up against each other and wedged between us at the foot of the bed, and your baby monitor on the bed next to me was silent. That's what struck me the most when I first awoke; the quiet.

Our house might not always be the quietest. We may not always get along; we might forget about what's really important in life and get sidetracked by the things we want and the things we think we need. We may not always be so certain that everything we do is the right thing, or that we're heading in the direction we want to go.

What I can tell you, Charlotte, is that when I woke up from our nap today, there was peace. And I was never more certain at any moment in my life that right here with you and Daddy is exactly where I am supposed to be. It's easy to let that get lost amidst all of the chaos of everyday life, but it's the one thing that should never, ever be forgotten. You and Daddy are the best part of my life, and I am so lucky to be his wife and your mommy.

I love you, sweet girl.